I’m Fine, Thanks– Except for the Cancer

Ever since last Wednesday, I’ve been composing blog posts in my mind.  It seemed to soothe my sleeplessness and give me a direction for my thoughts other than What Might Be.

In these imaginary blog posts I was by turn witty, sober, clever, insightful, blunt, whiney and silly.  I don’t know how this real post will turn out, but I thought you should know that those imaginary ones were amazing!

So here’s the thing:  months ago I made an appointment for a physical to be conducted on January 4, 2012.    I was waiting for the first of the year to pass so that my new insurance would kick in.  My main goal was to get something done about my back issues.  The back was behaving badly ever since the weeding marathons of June 2011, and something had to be done.

My doctor, my wonderful doctor, gave me a referral to a physical therapist for the back, a lab order for routine blood work, a referral for a colonoscopy and a referral for a mammogram (things you do at the advanced age of 50ish).

I had never had a mammogram before.  I was smug in the knowledge that I had no family history of breast cancer, no lumps or bumps, and I had breastfed all my babies, at least for a few weeks.  Smug, I say.  So, while I was already at the clinic, I scheduled one.  They got me in immediately.

Three mammograms, two ultrasounds and one biopsy later, it was Friday.  I waited until Tuesday for the results, and got them.

Smug was wiped off my silly face.

Invasive Lobular carcinoma, estrogen-receptive positive. Cancer.

I’ll get an MRI  and meet with a panel of surgeons and oncologists in the next few days and see what the options are.

The back doesn’t bother me so much any more.

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